It was strange enough that Anthony Chuzzlewit, himself so old a man, should take a pleasure in these gibings of his estimable son at the expense of the poor shadow at their table. But he did, unquestionably: though not so much -- to do him justice -- with reference to their ancient clerk, as in exultation at the sharpness of Jonas. For the same reason that young man's coarse allusions, even to himself, filled him with a stealthy glee: causing him to rub his hands and chuckle covertly, as if he said in his sleeve, ` I taught him. I trained him. This is the heir of my bringing-up. Sly, cunning, and covetous, he'll not squander my money.
I worked for this; I hoped for this; it has been the great end and aim of my life.'
What a noble end and aim it was to contemplate in the attainment truly!
But there be some who manufacture idols after the fashion of themselves, and fail to worship them when they are made; charging their deformity on outraged nature. Anthony was better than these at any rate.
Chuffey boggled over his plate so long, that Mr. Jones, losing patience, took it from him at last with his own hands, and requested his father to signify to that venerable person that he had better `peg away at his bread:' which Anthony did.
`Aye, aye!' cried the old man, brightening up as before, when this was communicated to him in the same voice, `quite right, quite right. He's your own son, Mr. Chuzzlewit! Bless him for a sharp lad! Bless him, bless him!'
Mr. Jonas considered this so particularly childish (perhaps with some reason), that he only laughed the more, and told his cousins that he was afraid one of these fine days, Chuffey would be the death of him. The cloth was then removed, and the bottle of wine set upon the table, from which Mr. Jonas filled the young ladies' glasses, calling on them not to spare it, as they might be certain there was plenty more where that came from.
But he added with some haste after this sally that it was only his joke, and they wouldn't suppose him to be in earnest, he was sure.
`I shall drink,' said Anthony, `to Pecksniff. Your father, my dears.
A clever man, Pecksniff. A wary man! A hypocrite, though, eh? A hypocrite, girls, eh? Ha, ha, ha! Well, so he is. Now, among friends, he is. I don't think the worse of him for that, unless it is that he overdoes it. You may overdo anything, my darlings. You may overdo even hypocrisy. Ask Jonas!'
`You can't overdo taking care of yourself,' observed that hopeful gentleman with his mouth full.
`Do you hear that, my dears?' cried Anthony, quite enraptured. `Wisdom, wisdom! A good exception, Jonas. No. It's not easy to overdo that.'
`Except,' whispered Mr. Jonas to his favourite cousin, `except when one lives too long. Ha, ha! Tell the other one that. I say!'
`Good gracious me!' said Cherry, in a petulant manner. `You can tell her yourself, if you wish, can't you?'
`She seems to make such game of one,' replied Mr. Jonas.
`Then why need you trouble yourself about her?' said Charity. `I am sure she doesn't trouble herself much about you.'
`Don't she though?' asked Jonas.
`Good gracious me, need I tell you that she don't?' returned the young lady.
Mr. Jonas made no verbal rejoinder, but he glanced at Mercy with an odd expression in his face; and said that wouldn't break his heart, she might depend upon it. Then he looked on Charity with even greater favour than before, and besought her, as his polite manner was, to `come a little closer.'
`There's another thing that's not easily overdone, father,' remarked Jonas, after a short silence.
`What's that?' asked the father; grinning already in anticipation.
`A bargain,' said the son. `Here's the rule for bargains. "Do other men, for they would do you." That's the true business precept. All others are counterfeits.'
The delighted father applauded this sentiment to the echo; and was so much tickled by it, that he was at the pains of imparting the same to his ancient clerk, who rubbed his hands, nodded his palsied head, winked his watery eyes, and cried in his whistling tones, `Good! good! Your own son, Mr. Chuzzlewit' with every feeble demonstration of delight that he was capable of making. But this old man's enthusiasm had the redeeming quality of being felt in sympathy with the only creature to whom he was linked by ties of long association, and by his present helplessness. And if there had been anybody there, who cared to think about it, some dregs of a better nature unawakened, might perhaps have been descried through that very medium, melancholy though it was, yet lingering at the bottom of the worn-out cask called Chuffey.
As matters stood, nobody thought or said anything upon the subject; so Chuffey fell back into a dark corner on one side of the fireplace, where he always spent his evenings, and was neither seen nor heard again that night; save once, when a cup of tea was given him, in which he was seen to soak his bread mechanically. There was no reason to suppose that he went to sleep at these seasons, or that he heard, or saw, or felt, or thought.
He remained, as it were, frozen up -- if any term expressive of such a vigorous process can be applied to him -- until he was again thawed for the moment by a word or touch from Anthony.
Miss Charity made tea by desire of Mr. Jonas, and felt and looked so like the lady of the house that she was in the prettiest confusion imaginable; the more so from Mr. Jonas sitting close beside her, and whispering a variety of admiring expressions in her ear. Miss Mercy, for her part, felt the entertainment of the evening to be so distinctly and exclusively theirs, that she silently deplored the commercial gentlemen -- at that moment, no doubt, wearying for her return -- and yawned over yesterday's newspaper.
As to Anthony, he went to sleep outright, so Jonas and Cherry had a clear stage to themselves as long as they chose to keep possession of it.
