登陆注册
4814600000008

第8章

I FULLY expected to find a Constable in the kitchen, waiting to take me up. But not only was there no Constable there, but no discovery had yet been made of the robbery. Mrs Joe was prodigiously busy in getting the house ready for the festivities of the day, and Joe had been put upon the kitchen door-step to keep him out of the dust-pan - an article into which his destiny always led him sooner or later, when my sister was vigorously reaping the floors of her establishment.

`And where the deuce ha' you been?' was Mrs Joe's Christmas salutation, when I and my conscience showed ourselves.

I said I had been down to hear the Carols. `Ah! well!' observed Mrs Joe. `You might ha' done worse.' Not a doubt of that, I thought.

`Perhaps if I warn't a blacksmith's wife, and (what's the same thing)a slave with her apron never off, I should have been to hear the Carols,' said Mrs Joe. `I'am rather partial to Carols, myself, and that's the best of reasons for my never hearing any.'

Joe, who had ventured into the kitchen after me as the dust-pan had retired before us, drew the back of his hand across his nose with a conciliatory air when Mrs Joe darted a look at him, and, when her eyes were withdrawn, secretly crossed his two forefingers, and exhibited them to me, as our token that Mrs Joe was in a cross temper. This was so much her normal state, that Joe and I would often, for weeks together, be, as to our fingers, like monumental Crusaders as to their legs.

We were to have a superb dinner, consisting of a leg of pickled pork and greens, and a pair of roast stuffed fowls. A handsome mince-pie had been made yesterday morning (which accounted for the mincemeat not being missed), and the pudding was already on the boil. These extensive arrangements occasioned us to be cut off unceremoniously in respect of breakfast; `for I an't,' said Mrs Joe, `I an't a going to have no formal cramming and busting and washing up now, with what I've got before me, I promise you!'

So, we had our slices served out, as if we were two thousand troops on a forced march instead of a man and boy at home; and we took gulps of milk and water, with apologetic countenances, from a jug on the dresser.

In the meantime, Mrs Joe put clean white curtains up, and tacked a new flowered-flounce across the wide chimney to replace the old one, and uncovered the little state parlour across the passage, which was never uncovered at any other time, but passed the rest of the year in a cool haze of silver paper, which even extended to the four little white crockery poodles on the mantelshelf, each with a black nose and a basket of flowers in his mouth, and each the counterpart of the other. Mrs Joe was a very clean housekeeper, but had an exquisite art of making her cleanliness more uncomfortable and unacceptable than dirt itself. Cleanliness is next to Godliness, and some people do the same by their religion.

My sister having so much to do, was going to church vicariously; that is to say, Joe and I were going. In his working clothes, Joe was a well-knit characteristic-looking blacksmith; in his holiday clothes, he was more like a scarecrow in good circumstances, than anything else. Nothing that he wore then, fitted him or seemed to belong to him; and everything that he wore then, grazed him. On the present festive occasion he emerged from his room, when the blithe bells were going, the picture of misery, in a full suit of Sunday penitentials. As to me, I think my sister must have had some general idea that I was a young offender whom an Accoucheur Policemen had taken up (on my birthday) and delivered over to her, to be dealt with according to the outraged majesty of the law. I was always treated as if I had insisted on being born, in opposition to the dictates of reason, religion, and morality, and against the dissuading arguments of my best friends. Even when I was taken to have a new suit of clothes, the tailor had orders to make them like a kind of Reformatory, and on no account to let me have the free use of my limbs.

Joe and I going to church, therefore, must have been a moving spectacle for compassionate minds. Yet, what I suffered outside, was nothing to what I underwent within. The terrors that had assailed me whenever Mrs Joe had gone near the pantry, or out of the room, were only to be equalled by the remorse with which my mind dwelt on what my hands had done. Under the weight of my wicked secret, I pondered whether the Church would be powerful enough to shield me from the vengeance of the terrible young man, if I divulged to that establishment. I conceived the idea that the time when the banns were read and when the clergyman said, `Ye are now to declare it!' would be the time for me to rise and propose a private conference in the vestry.

I am far from being sure that I might not have astonished our small congregation by resorting to this extreme measure, but for its being Christmas Day and no Sunday.

Mr Wopsle, the clerk at church, was to dine with us; and Mr Hubble the wheelwright and Mrs Hubble; and Uncle Pumblechook (Joe's uncle, but Mrs Joe appropriated him), who was a well-to-do corn-chandler in the nearest town, and drove his own chaise-cart. The dinner hour was half-past one.

When Joe and I got home, we found the table laid, and Mrs Joe dressed, and the dinner dressing, and the front door unlocked (it never was at any other time) for the company to enter by, and everything most splendid.

And still, not a word of the robbery.

同类推荐
  • 梅谱序

    梅谱序

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 丹阳神光灿

    丹阳神光灿

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 煮药漫抄

    煮药漫抄

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 北狩行录

    北狩行录

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • The Argonautica

    The Argonautica

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
热门推荐
  • 追妻无门:女boss不好惹

    追妻无门:女boss不好惹

    青涩蜕变,如今她是能独当一面的女boss,爱了冷泽聿七年,也同样花了七年时间去忘记他。以为是陌路,他突然向他表白,扬言要娶她,她只当他是脑子抽风,他的殷勤她也全都无视。他帮她查她父母的死因,赶走身边情敌,解释当初拒绝她的告别,和故意对她冷漠都是无奈之举。突然爆出她父母的死居然和冷家有丝毫联系,还莫名跳出个公爵未婚夫,扬言要与她履行婚约。峰回路转,破镜还能重圆吗? PS:我又开新文了,每逢假期必书荒,新文《有你的世界遇到爱》,喜欢我的文的朋友可以来看看,这是重生类现言,对这个题材感兴趣的一定要收藏起来。
  • 重生野蛮年代

    重生野蛮年代

    逆流归来,重启1992年!程岩记得,那一晚,夜色斑驳,寒风刺骨!
  • 中国香港文学史

    中国香港文学史

    香港经济的飞速发展,以及由于这种发展所带来的报业的发展,香港人独特的生活方式和紧张的生活节奏……都在向文学要求着快餐式的精神消费。随着香港商业化程度的提高,通俗小说也以一种超过严肃小说发展的速度来满足市民的需求。
  • 追妻无门:女boss不好惹

    追妻无门:女boss不好惹

    青涩蜕变,如今她是能独当一面的女boss,爱了冷泽聿七年,也同样花了七年时间去忘记他。以为是陌路,他突然向他表白,扬言要娶她,她只当他是脑子抽风,他的殷勤她也全都无视。他帮她查她父母的死因,赶走身边情敌,解释当初拒绝她的告别,和故意对她冷漠都是无奈之举。突然爆出她父母的死居然和冷家有丝毫联系,还莫名跳出个公爵未婚夫,扬言要与她履行婚约。峰回路转,破镜还能重圆吗? PS:我又开新文了,每逢假期必书荒,新文《有你的世界遇到爱》,喜欢我的文的朋友可以来看看,这是重生类现言,对这个题材感兴趣的一定要收藏起来。
  • 农家恶女

    农家恶女

    疼!头好晕,好疼!失手从高低杠上摔下来磕到了头,夏小翜疼得忍不住呲牙咧嘴,连睡觉都无法睡熟。“娘,二姐好像醒了。”小女娃稚嫩的声音响起,也就五六岁的样子,夏小翜听着,皱了皱眉,不知道是谁在说话。“是吗?我看看。”又是一道温和的女人声音,“二妞儿,二妞儿?你醒了吗?”夏小翜很不耐烦,张嘴就吼,却吼得毫无气势:“靠!谁特么开着电视呢?吵我睡觉……
  • 华服宠妻

    华服宠妻

    龚流月,现代的一名读服装设计的大学生,在一次的毕业旅行的回国途中,莫名的穿越了。对于一名二十一世纪的女强人预备生来说,古代的各种女卑思想的接受不了我的世界由我创,谁说女人就要靠男人的。在创造属于自己的世界的过程中,遇到了各种挫折,嫡母的为难,女卑世界的思想打压,女子的各种不方便虽然在古代,但是不管是怎么样的女生,总会遇到一个对的人,一个可以接受龚流月各种奇异思想的男人在二十一世纪找不到男朋友的龚同学,在二十一世纪被人认为是不婚族的龚同学,肯定可以在古代嫁出去的一生一世一双人绝对不是梦,我会实现她的......
  • 续修台湾府志

    续修台湾府志

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 首席萌妻咬一口

    首席萌妻咬一口

    如果在你全身只剩80块钱,蓝颜对你说,有个人要跟你见面,我分你3000块大洋,你会不会去见?白晓云的回答是:“为什么是我去见?你给钱?”果然其中必有猫腻……这一问才知道,蓝颜用她的Q上的内测号当了回人妖,勾搭上了第一土豪。而她的照片居然还赫然出现在官网,成了网全服第一美人!当她和自己的游戏号挂情缘的居然是那个自己仰慕的顶级校草的时候,白晓云决定盗自己的号,以便和大神交流感情,至于大洋嘛,先不要了,他们之间的情缘,岂3000块大洋能衡量的……
  • 假想剑

    假想剑

    立于假想中,剑握于手。所以,那究竟是什么。一个转世的,执剑的少年,牵扯到前生的因果,在这神秘外露的世界,又会怎么样呢?“嗯?这可没有选择的余地。”他这次不只是握着剑的站在那。
  • 快穿之女主当道

    快穿之女主当道

    【1v1】藏海雾——一个平平凡凡普普通通平平淡淡的人,一不小心被车撞死,还被告知要当女主?what?海雾缓了缓,认命接受,可是……过去的二十多年以来,毫无感情基础的情感小白遇见撩妹高手的男主要怎么办?系统:都是大猪蹄子,啃下来!