`And yet,' I interrupted, `you have no scruples in completely ruining all hopes of her perfect restoration, by thrusting yourself into her remembrance now, when she has nearly forgotten you, and involving her in a new tumult of discord and distress.'
`You suppose she has nearly forgotten me?' he said.`Oh, Nelly!
you know she has not! You know as well as I do, that for every thought she spends on Linton, she spends a thousand on me! At a most miserable period of my life, I had a notion of the kind: it haunted me on my return to the neighbourhood last summer; but only her own assurance could make me admit the horrible idea again.And then, Linton would be nothing, nor Hindley, nor all the dreams that ever I dreamt.Two words would comprehend my future-- death and hell : existence, after losing her, would be hell.Yet I was a fool to fancy for a moment that she valued Edgar Linton's attachment more than mine.If he loved with all the powers of his puny being, he couldn't love as much in eighty years as I could in a day.And Catherine has a heart as deep as I have: the sea could be as readily contained in that horse-trough, as her whole affection be monopolized by him! Tush!
He is scarcely a degree dearer to her than her dog, or her horse.It is not in him to be loved like me: how can she love in him what he has not?'
`Catherine and Edgar are as fond of each other as any two people can be,' cried Isabella, with sudden vivacity.`No one has a right to talk in that manner, and I won't hear my brother depreciated in silence!'
`Your brother is wondrous fond of you too, isn't he?' observed Heathcliff scornfully.`He turns you adrift on the world with surprising alacrity.'
`He is not aware of what I suffer,' she replied.`I didn't tell him that.
`You have been telling him something, then: you have written, have you?'
`To say that I was married, I did write--you saw the note.`And nothing since?'
`No.'
`My young lady is looking sadly the worse for her change of condition,'
I remarked.`Somebody's love comes short in her case, obviously: whose, I may guess; but, perhaps, I shouldn't say.'
`I should guess it was her own,' said Heathcliff.`She degenerates into a mere slut! She is tired of trying to please me uncommonly early.
You'd hardly credit it, but the very morrow of our wedding, she was weeping to go home.However, she'll suit this house so much the better for not being over nice, and I'll take care she does not disgrace me by rambling abroad.'
`Well, sir,' returned I, `I hope you'll consider that Mrs Heathcliff is accustomed to be looked after and waited on; and that she has been brought up like an only daughter, whom everyone was ready to serve.You must let her have a maid to keep things tidy about her, and you must treat her kindly.
Whatever be your notion of Mr Edgar, you cannot doubt that she has a capacity for strong attachments, or she wouldn't have abandoned the elegances, and comforts, and friends of her former home, to fix contentedly, in such a wilderness as this, with you.'
`She abandoned them under a delusion,' he answered; `picturing in me a hero of romance, and expecting unlimited indulgences from my chivalrous devotion.I can hardly regard her in the light of a rational creature, so obstinately has she persisted in forming a fabulous notion of my character and acting on the false impressions she cherished.But, at last, I think she begins to know me: I don't perceive the silly smiles and grimaces that provoked me at first; and the senseless incapability of discerning that I was in earnest when I gave her my opinion of her infatuation and herself.
It was a marvellous effort of perspicacity to discover that I did not love her.I believed, at one time, no lessons could teach her that! And yet it is poorly learnt; for this morning she announced, as a piece of appalling intelligence, that I had actually succeeded in making her hate me! A positive labour of Hercules, I assure you! If it be achieved, I have cause to return thanks.Can I trust your assertion, Isabella? Are you sure you hate me?
If I let you alone for half a day, won't you come sighing and wheedling to me again? I dare say she would rather I had seemed all tenderness before you: it wounds her vanity to have the truth exposed.But I don't care who knows that the passion was wholly on one side; and I never told her a lie about it.She cannot accuse me of showing a bit of deceitful softness.
The first thing she saw me do, on coming out of the Grange, was to hang up her little dog; and when she pleaded for it, the first words I uttered were a wish that I had the hanging of every being belonging to her, except one: possibly she took that exception for herself.But no brutality disgusted her: I suppose she has an innate admiration of it, if only her precious person were secure from injury! Now, was it not the depth of absurdity--of genuine idiocy, for that pitiful, slavish, mean-minded brach to dream that I could love her? Tell your master, Nelly, that I never, in all my life, met with such an abject thing as she is.She even disgraces the name of Linton; and I've sometimes relented, from pure lack of invention, in my experiments on what she could endure, and still creep shamefully cringing back! But tell him, also, to set his fraternal and magisterial heart at ease: that I keep strictly within the limits of the law.I have avoided, up to this period, giving her the slightest right to claim a separation;and, what's more, she'd thank nobody for dividing us.If she desired to go, she might: the nuisance of her presence outweighs the gratification to be derived from tormenting her!'
`Mr Heathcliff,' said I, `this is the talk of a madman, and your wife, most likely, is convinced you are mad; and, for that reason, she has borne with you hitherto: but now that you say she may go, she'll doubtless avail herself of the permission.You are not so bewitched, ma'am, are you, as to remain with him of your own accord?'
